It's hard for me to realize that many people like me in spite of the my job, I guess ‘cause it's such a central part of my life and has played such a huge part in shaping me to be who I am today. I feel like they're denying a core part of me and that hurts. Liz says maybe I could think of it as they are just not evolved enought to accept it*. It's not in them. Kind of like Dad just really can't understand my aunt's treatment of Grandma. It's just not in him and he flat-out despises her for it. That has been on my mind since she (Liz) suggested it ‘cause I really think if I can get my head around the concept in a meaningful and thorough way, that I could find some serenity from it.

So basically, because my job has been so influential, people like me in part because of my job - they just don't realize it - and that can be okay.

Hmm...

*I feel I must emphasize that I don't mean "evolve" in an egotistical way - like I'm more evolved than them but I've found it hard to find the right words for this...